FAQ

  • Who do you think you are? 

    Good question. To quote Alan Jackson, “I’m just a singer of simple songs.” I like to think of myself as a songwriter who taps into the emotions and the psyche of the common man and woman. One who is in tune with the universe and fluent in the universal language of love.

  • What the hell are you doing? 

    Good question. Again, I must quote Alan Jackson, whom I should point out I do not know nor has he ever recorded one of my songs, “I’m just a singer of simple songs.” That’s what I do. All day, everyday, I write and sing “simple” songs. At times I take a break from that to do laundry.

  • When are you gonna learn? 

    Good question. I believe in continuing my education. My mother was an educator. She taught French, which I should point out I do not speak although I am quite fluent in the universal language of love. She also taught English and Psychology. Perhaps her influence is the reason I am able to so easily tap into the psyche of the common man and woman and to write about it. In English of course. I don’t know.

  • Where do you get off? 

    Good question. It depends on where I am going and where I am coming from at the time. For instance, if I am traveling North on I-65 and I am headed to Music Row, I usually take the Wedgewood exit. I then turn left on Wedgewood and drive approximately 2 miles until I reach 16th Avenue. Then, I turn right on 16th, unless of course I have no reason to drive down 16th Avenue that day, in which case I probably would not have exited on Wedgewood in the first place. So you see, it really all depends. Please try to be more specific in your questions. I am not a mind reader. I’m just a singer of simple songs.

  • Why don’t you watch where you’re going? 

    Very good question. As we travel down life’s highway, it is impossible for one to see where he or she is going. The future is not ours to see. We can only look in the rear view mirror. To quote Mac Davis, I see “Texas in my rear view mirror.” I’m from Texas, so that line is particularly poignant for me.

  • Are you a moron? 

    Odd question. But, I believe you are referring to the MoRAN‘s. The Moran family did in fact live in my hometown of Perrin, Texas. I’m not sure how you knew that, but they did. That made us neighbors, not family. I am a Patton, and to my knowledge the Patton family is not related to the Moran family. I could be wrong, as I am not a genealogist. If you have knowledge pertaining to my relationship to the Moran’s, please contact me so that I may update my holiday greeting card list.

  • Are you related to General Patton? 

    Good question. No. General George S. Patton is not a member of my particular branch of the Patton family tree. Or visa versa. However, I confess that I have on occasion claimed to be related to General Patton. Not to maliciously mislead anyone. Only to feel good about myself, or to impress a date. No harm, no foul. Right?

  • Where’s Willie? 

    Good question. The last time I saw Willie Nelson was July 2000. Sorry, but I don’t recall the exact location or date. I could possibly get that information from an old itinerary if necessary. Back then I was on the road with Rebecca Lynn Howard, and we were the opening act for one of Willie’s concerts. After our show, I went out and stood in the back of the arena to watch Willie perform. Beer was being sold at the concession stands, so the crowd was very “enthusiastic”. Not unlike the crowd at an outdoor biker festival I once played with Ricky Skaggs. Anyway, a group of people recognized me from having just been onstage. They walked over to where I was standing and struck up a conversation. Just the sort of conversation one might have with overly “enthusiastic” bikers at an outdoor biker festival. They offered to buy me a beer, and not wanting to seem rude, I accepted. While we were talking, Willie kicked off Whiskey River which sent my new best friends into a frenzy. They began jumping up and down screaming “WILLIEEEEEEEEEEE!” I guess all the excitement was just too much, because after a minute or so of doing this non-stop one of them doubled over and threw up on the arena floor where we were standing. At that point I politely thanked them for buying me a beer, said good-bye, and went back to the bus. I haven’t seen Willie since.

  • Where’s Jesse? 

    Sad question, but thanks for asking. I’m not sure how you knew about Jesse, the pet Whitetail deer my family had when I was a child. Perhaps you have been talking to Morans? Regardless, she is no longer with us. She was tragically killed when Molly, our pet German Shepherd at the time, tore through the chicken wire of her pen and ripped out her throat. It was indeed a traumatic childhood experience, as you can well imagine. But on a happier note, we captured another fawn the following spring and named it Sugar **. Thank goodness Molly was gone by then.

** No animals were harmed during the construction of this website. I do not endorse or participate in the capture of wild animals, such as baby deer, for the purpose of taming them to become pets. I’ve tried it, and it just doesn’t work. Especially, not if you own a German Shepherd. However, I do on occasion eat meat. Red, white, the other white, dark, whatever.

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